Mother's Day Quiche

So, the conversation went a little something like this: 

I decided to make quiche. Only, because I'm me, I had to make it "special" with  a potato  crust. 

Here is what you'll need:

2 russet potatoes

11 eggs

2 cups sliced baby portobello mushrooms

1 summer squash, sliced

1 zucchini squash, sliced

1 cup red onions diced

3 minced cloves of garlic

1 can artichoke hearts

1 cup heavy cream

Dill weed

Salt and pepper

Oregano 

1 bag shredded cheese (white cheddar is good)

So, heat the oven to 400F. While your oven takes ten years to do this, grate your potatoes. Lightly beat one egg, and then mix the egg, potatoes 1/2 cup of the onion, and 1 cup of flour together. Grease the dish you are going to use and spread the potatoes evenly on the bottom and up the sides, just like you would with pie crust. 

Your oven is probably faster than mine and done preheating by now, so pop the dish in the oven. 

While the crust is baking, cook the rest of the onion and garlic until softened. Add the baby portobello mushrooms, salt, pepper, dill and oregano to taste. Once the mushrooms begin the soften, add the squash and artichokes. Cook until squash is soft but not mushy, no one likes mushy squash unless they don't have teeth. 

Beat the remainder of your eggs in a bowl. Add 1 cup of heavy whipping cream, salt and pepper to taste, and slowly mix the heavy whip in... Don't go too fast or it will begin to turn into whipped cream, which would be weird. 

Next, pull the crust out (it's been 20 minutes!) use a slotted spoon to transfer 1/2 the veggies into the crust. Put cheese over them then pour the egg mixture on top. Dump the rest of the veggies and more cheese in (save some cheese for the very end). Push any veggies that are not under the egg down with your slotted spoon. 

Turn the oven down to 350F and bake the quiche for 35/40 minutes or until you stab it with a knife and there is no evidence left on your blade. 

And, that's how you cook when you grew up in Ballard. 

Whole30 ish: Easter Eggs, or just eggs in general

What came first? The chicken or the egg? WHO CARES! They are both delicious in both forms.  You don’t like one, try another.  I don’t like ice in my water, maybe you don’t like chicken, but you surely can’t dislike an EGG.  They are so delicious.  They are also a staple of breakfast and snacking in Whole30, or in what I am doing now…Whole9 (which is life…you just eat whole30ish most of the time-avoiding the things you know cause issues *ahem* dairy, beans, sugar- and then make decisions about the food you are going to eat and decide if it was worth it or not).

So here are some tricks for eggs that helped me out:

Poached eggs.  Let me be basic for a minute here: I. Can’t. Even! OH MY GOD. I LOVE poached eggs. Ok. So, sometimes I use my egg poacher

I bought mine at Value Village and then bought a heavy sauce pan to go with it.  You can buy them new, but they are actually attached to the pan, making them a one use item...which is dumb, and at Target they are $500. Just kidding, but this one was $2.99 and I see them at Goodwill and Value Village all the time, and I use the sauce pan to make poached eggs and other various items (paleo tortillas anyone?), making the pan useful in multiple ways.

When I'm not using my egg poacher, I use the Julia method.  I'll describe it, but there is a really helpful description and video here:

Julia, my secondary spirit animal (I still love Martha more)

So, you will need a pan, a shallow dish (I use a little cooking salt bowl, a ramekin would probably work too), slotted spoon, and a timer (or just count 1 Mississippi...).

Get your water boiling, drop in your eggs still in the shell for 10 seconds.  Pull them out with the slotted spoon.  Crack them into your ramekin (individually for this part).  Take your slotted spoon and get the water swirling.  I'm pretty aggressive about my tornado (the video I shared is not). Pour your egg into the whirlpool.  I then immediately add the other egg.  Cook until your preferred level of yolky goodness Anything longer then 4 minutes for me is no bueno, but do what you want.

Ok! Now that you have eaten breakfast, you can start some intensive meal prep and hard boil 7,000 eggs.  You might be thinking "but my hard boiled eggs always have that gross grey rim and they are so hard to peel!"  No longer my little chickadee. Steam those bad boys and your troubles will disappear!

Steamed hard boiled eggs

You will need:

a large pot

Slotted spoon

a large bowl

ice (or other frozen items)

kitchen timer (counting isn't going to cut it on this one)

Fill your pot with enough water to cover one layer of eggs (but don't put the eggs in the pot yet).

Bring the water to a boil.  Carefully place your eggs into the boiling water.  Cover and boil for 10-15 minutes (this is where you will have to trouble shoot.  Try out different lengths until you find the one that works for your stove and pot...I use a stock pot with a pretty heavy bottom and I have an electric rage.  I boil for 15 minutes).  While your eggs are boiling, get your large bowl and fill it with cold water and ice (or if you are me and don't like ice, therefore refuse to let it take up room in the freezer, throw in your jars of frozen bone broth). As soon as the timer sounds, rescue your eggs from the hot tub with a slotted spoon and place them in the ice bath.  Let them sit in there until they are cool to the touch.  Then, crack and peel them in the cold water. Sometimes I run more cold water into the bowl as I am peeling.

Another egg thing I do:

Each week I make some sort of egg grab-and-go for breakfast.  Last week I made a scramble.  I've done little egg cups in muffin tin with uncured pork.  It's easy, fast, and delicious. Here are two recipes that I made up.  good luck!

Turkey Sausage scramble

1lb ground turkey

1 16oz jar of salsa (check ingredients for sugar and other hidden garbage)

1 Anaheim chili (roasted, peeled, and diced)

1.5 tsp of all of the following: cumin, garlic powder, cayenne pepper, black pepper, paprika

1 tbsp coarse salt

1 tsp bacon fat (or another cooking fat of your choice)

10 eggs

Brown the turkey.  Drain off the fat.  Add all dry ingredients.  Once incorporated, add the chili.  Then, dump in the salsa.  Beat your eggs and pour over the meat.  Use your spatula to incorporate the eggs and meat. Taa Daa!

Egg and Meat cups

Roasted Red pepper strips

5 eggs

5 slices of uncured no sugar added pancetta 

muffin tin

salt and pepper to taste

First, oil your little muffin tin.  Do not use grape-seed oil.  That shit will stick to your tin and you'll never get it off.   Put one piece of pancetta in each muffin tin.  Add a few strips of red pepper. Crack and egg over the top. Put in the oven at 375 (sounds good, I think that's the temperature...maybe you should watch closely for this one). Cook until egg whites are firm.  

Think of all the variations and options!

Egggggggggssss.  Happy Easter!

Whole30: Chili!

Whole30: Chili, the best thing on earth.

So… I love making chili.  And I am going to share the 3 chili recipes that I have had success with thus far in my Whole30 career.  I didn’t make these up, and I really recommend that you follow @whole30recipes on Instagram...life changing.  It has given me a ton of new stuff to try out. 

I usually make one chili or soup for the week, and then two or three other entrees and rotate them for lunch and dinner.

Crock pot chili

• 1lb beef chuck
• 1 onion chopped
• 2 carrots chopped
• 2 minced garlic cloves
• 1 diced bell pepper
• 28oz can diced tomatoes (check ingredients)
• ½ cup beef stock (check ingredients)
• 1 tbsp paprika
• 1 tbsp chili powder
• 2 tsp cumin
• 2 tsp coriander
• 1 ½ tsp salt
• ½ tsp pepper

Toss in the crock pot on low for 6-8 hours.

 

Next up, Southwest Cowboy Chili from Nom Nom Paleo:

http://www.seriouseats.com/recipes/2014/02/southwest-cowboy-chili-from-nom-nom-paleo.html

This was SPICY after letting it sit for a day.

And, last but not least (and my FAVORITE!): Bacon Bison Chili

http://www.ourpaleolife.com/2013/08/bacon-bison-chili/

You don’t have to use bison, but it’s super delicious, so you should.

Why Whole30?

Mostly, I am neurotic and always doing something.  It might be 100 consecutive days of working out, a cleanse, giving away something every day for 30 days, waking up at 4:30 am to go the gym 3 days a week, betting against myself using PACT app.  You know, crazy shit…all the time. I had heard of the Whole30 a few times.  A friend completed one and I was intrigued.  She said that she felt great and was sleeping better.

So, being me, I did research.  A lot of research.  I checked out their website, their book, blogs of people that had completed a Whole30, articles in semi-reputable magazines, yadda yadda yadda.  Then I saw an article that sealed the deal.  It was about a person with Psoriasis that completed Whole30 and got some relief. WHAT?! Relief from our uncurable condition? The plaques of itchy dry skin? The one that requires me to apply peanut oil saturated medication to my head for at least 4 hours multiple times a week? The one that also requires me to take methotrexate (low dose chemo) which makes me sleep for hours on end and feel like crap WITH NO RESULTS. The one that makes it so people think I have lice because my head itches so bad that I think I might cry if I don’t scratch it?  The one that has totally taken over my torso, looking like I have chicken pox? The disease that has annihilated my self confidence? The one that has completely removed dark colors from my wardrobe.  Requires me to do a quick “swipe  and shake” of my clothes when I enter a room.  SIGN ME UP.  Whole30, I’m with you. Oh, I might lose some weight?….bonus.

So, I studied the list of compliant foods, started following Whole30, Whole30recipes, and multiple whole30 adherents on Instagram.  I printed recipes, bought everything I needed, including some new spices and sauces, and embarked.

I already do meal prep on Sundays, so that was not an adjustment.  What was an adjustment was reading labels.  EVERY SINGLE LABEL, and discovering that sugar and soy are in almost everything. AHHHH!  Stay away from anything in a package or box is what I have learned.

So, here are my tips and tricks for a successful Whole30:

Food, Spices, Sauces

• ·         Avocado, all the avocado
• ·         Aidell’s Chicken and Apple Sausage
• ·         Eggs (you should probably just get a chicken)
• ·         Cashews
• ·         Canned Coconut Milk (yes, I know Starbucks carries it, no, it has crap in it that is not coconut or water)
• ·         Whole Chickens
• ·         Coconut Aminos
• ·         Coconut Oil
• ·         Pork shoulder
• ·         Bacon (go to Whole Foods and buy this. You have to splurge and you don’t want added sugar)
• ·         Sweet Potatoes
• ·         Lara Bars (check the ingredients, vanilla extract is a no no)

Kitchen supplies:

• ·         Crock pot
• ·         Veggetti or spiralizer
• ·         Good knives
• ·         Kitchen scissors
• ·         Slotted spoon
• ·         Tons of Rubbermaid containers (or whatever you use)

Ok, go. You’re ready.

Just kidding.  Check out Whole30.com for lists of compliant foods and the basics for the program.  But, basically: protein, healthy fat, veggies.  Cook with healthy fats,  add them to your meal (nuts in moderation, avocado….) don’t use things with added sugar or nitrates, no dairy or grains, no soy or corn or legumes (that means peanuts and beans…and other stuff). Don’t look for “paleo cookies” or other items that are technically compliant, but totally cheating because they are just a fake version of something that you are completely addicted to…like ice cream.  The point is to clear your system out for 30 days, then reintroduce things slowly so that you can pinpoint what your body is sensitive to.

I cook 3 or 4 main dishes on Sunday and portion them out.  I also portion out all of my snacks.  I then prepare some “just incase items” like a container of shredded pork, a ton of hard boiled eggs, pre-cut veggies, etc.  That way if I am feeling hangry, I just grab some stuff and cook it up.

After my first round of Whole30, I felt great. Then diet coke and I sort of started an affair that ended with me eating three boxes of Girl Scout cookies.  We broke up. You aren’t going to go hungry, but you will most likely have a wicked headache for the first few days.  Oh, and you’ll also feel waves of violence when people are eating sweet treats of delight in front of you.

So, is my Psoriasis gone? Nope. Is it better? Yes.  Autoimmune diseases are sometimes tied to inflammation, and cutting out certain foods helps with that, so I have experienced a little bit of improvement.  The other shitty thing about autoimmune diseases is that people usually have more than one, and I do.  BUT, I read an article yesterday about a person experiencing my secondary autoimmune disease and has adopted a Whole9 approach to life (check out the website or book), and her diagnosis was REVERSED. WHAT?!  So, fingers crossed, but I honestly don’t care that much….I feel better when I am eating healthy, and I am a person that needs guidelines, so this is perfect. Holler at your girl if you want some recipes.

Pumpkin Dip

Hey! You should make this! 

It's delicious. I served it with a mixture of Gala, Fuji, and Granny Smith apples, as well as thin ginger snaps. And only 107 calories for 2tbsps!

Then, go to Safeway and buy a pumpkin dish from the seasonal aisle to make it festive.

Biscuits and Gravy Casserole

I grew up in Ballard before it was a hipster heaven. What was it like then? Blue collar and working class glory. I spent afternoons and summers running around in "the gully" (if you're cool enough, you know). Dinner was always some sort of casserole because it was cheap, easy, and filling.

My love of the casserole has stayed with me, as you can see by my multiple renditions of tater tot casserole. 

Another thing I loved as a kid was when my mom would be at a PTA meeting or sometimes a knitting class and it was "Dad dinner night." This meant McDonald's or breakfast for dinner. Tom Galloway is an expert in bacon, sausage, and soft boiled eggs. Therefore, I love savory breakfast. So, combining those two lives, I give you my masterpiece: Biscuits and Gravy Casserole

You will need:

9x13 pan, sprayed with non stick spray

Oven heated to 350

1 package of shredded cheddar cheese (16oz)

6 eggs

1/2 cup whole milk

I log of Jimmy Dean Sausage in maple

2 packages of sausage gravy mix

1 can (16oz) of Pillisbury buttermilk biscuits

Salt and pepper 

Start out with your biscuits. Lay them all out and cut them into 4ths, like, in half, then in half again. Spread those in one layer along the bottom of your pan. 

Next, cook the sausage. You want it to be loose, not in patties like the package tells you. Cook it like hamburger helper. Drain off the fat and salt and pepper it, then spread on top of the biscuits. 

Now, beat the 6 eggs and the milk. Spread the cheddar cheese over the sausage and then pour the eggs over the top.

Make the gravy per the package directions. When you pour it over the eggs, they will start to cook because the gravy is HOT. Don't freak out. Just put it in the oven! 

Bake for about 35 minutes.

Take it to Seahawks Sunday and revel in the praise. 

Direct quote "I could eat that entire thing."

A little trashy is always the best.

Make sure to serve it on Ballard chinaware:

Serves 8 at 414 calories each.

Baked French Toast deliciousness

So, Mother's Day has not always been my best holiday.  I tend to work best under a deadline, and this one always sneaks up on me, and then I go "well, better luck next year."  Plus, my mom already has something planned because she has a Mum to plan for too.  This year was a little different. Mum has been in and out of the hospital and generally loving to not get out of bed.  So, we would be going to visit her at Bayview, and not planning some brunch out or BBQ, or whatever we typically do.
So, I decided we would have brunch at my house. Thomas was on board and  wanted to make BLTs, I said I'd cover the rest.  I gave Mom some options, she picked baked French toast, and it was AMAZING.  I got the recipe from Martha Stewart.  just called her up and said "hey, I need a recipe.' Here is the link for those of you that don't have her phone number: http://www.marthastewart.com/346883/baked-french-toast

And, as usual, I messed some stuff up which made it better! Like, in the step where it says to add 1/3 cup sugar, I just put in all the sugar I had measured out (1/3c + 3T), and Safeway didn't have a loaf of brioche, so I used brioche rolls cut in half.  I always used a metal pan, and I let the brioche soak in the batter overnight.

But, my dad ate almost half of it, so I call that #WINNING (I've been waiting for an appropriate time to bring that back).